I would just note that you have an image of some "great X" that you are trying to live up to, when really, there is no frame of reference to standardize a measure for X. Point being you and your circumstances are completely uniqueWarren Buffet talks about the idea of maintaining an inner score card of principles to escape this girardian mimetic rat-race. Also, James Richardon, the poet, says this beautifully in his book "Vectors: Aphorisms and 10 Second Essays":
“He wants to know what the best is so he can be superior to everything at once by seeing that the best isn’t perfect”.
One way to handle this would be to realize the fragility of the epistemic confidence acquired as a result of accomplishment based superiority. Socio-cultural structure like Humility can help with this a lot. It is to be noted that Humility is the knowing of the epistemic gap, and not the false pretension to decieve each other into playing the comparison and pseudo-superiority game, which would just defeat the purpose of seeing the uniqueness of circumstance.
Warren Buffet. (Unknown). The Inner Scorecard